It’s the feeling of tightness in my neck that warns me of the attack.
The soreness in my upper back, slowly creeping down my spine.
The tingling in my feet when I sit or lay down reminds me that I’m a hostage.
The ache in my wrists and my fingers turn to stabbing reminders of my mortality.
The wobble in my knee caps as I toss and turn in my sleep, crashing into my skin.
The yelp that catches in my throat when I feel them buckle beneath me.
The tenderness of my joints resting compared to the scraping of bone on bone when I rise.
The heaviness in my shoulders and legs that begs me to just sit and rest awhile.
The cramping and swelling of my feet battle with the stiffness in my neck for first place.
The pain that wakes me at night and I wake with a restless mind.
The thoughts that carousel in my mind are replaced by the gnawing feeling that my body will one day waste away.
The pangs in my muscles and the ache in my bones that try to wear my mind down.
Little does my body know,
I will not surrender.
I will get up in the morning despite my toes cramping and my ankles screaming.
I will walk outside and feel my lungs breathe despite the aching in my chest.
I will feel my muscles stretch and twinge and thank them for their movement.
I will open my eyes even though sleep begs them to close.
I never chose a life of chronic illness.
She found my body one day, curled up into a ball and found home in my skin.
She stretches through my aching muscles like a parasite, claiming each limb like a new territory.
She tries to conquer my body and wills me to break.
Little does she know,
I will not surrender.
I will not concede.
I come from warriors.
Just try to stop me.
NEEDLE&QUILL 
Leave a comment